Love Will Blind.

Here I find myself at 2:18am, lying in bed and reading some tweets, when it hits me.

People will fail you.

I have always seen the best in everyone and I tried not to accept the fact above, but it is oh so true. I have no clue why, but right now it clicks. Looking back on past friendships, relationships, and just random people I have met, I finally have seen this. It's like this whole time God had put this veil over my eyes. I could still see the hurt and wrong-doing being done to me, but I never wanted to accept that the person actually failed me because all that I could see was hazy.
But now the veil is off, and I can see clearly. I can see the emotional wounds that were placed on me from those in my past. Those who hurt me with words and actions. I am speechless.

And it's not just the people in my past either, some are doing it right now. Whether they know it or not, they are breaking me down to my core. Making me feel like I did or said something wrong. Making me question myself and my confidence. Making me question the fact that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. What kills me the most about it too, is I can't say anything. I'm holding on to the one feeling that if I tell them what I'm thinking, everything will just tumble down. It's like things could have been better if I would have just kept my mouth shut.

But the reality of this whole situation is that I should not be fearing what I will say. What kind of friendship/relationship is that? That one person feels they should not say how they feel, so that everything runs smoothy.

So as much as I like to put friends on pedestals, I have to stop. Because one day, they will fail me. It's not that I don't value/treasure the people who are in my life, because I do so much. But I have realized that they are not perfect humans. The only friend I should be putting on a pedestal, the highest one in fact, is Jesus. The only truly perfect human being. When people on this earth fail me, I have to have someone to run to, who has open arms to catch me in and tell me it's going to be alright. Who knows every little part of me, every wound, every emotion, every beautiful flaw.

It's crazy how much comfort that puts me in.


As for my beautifully imperfect friends, I will still love them for the marvelous human beings that they are. As much as it hurts me to know that they will fail me, I have to keep loving. Because one day I will fail them, and I have failed many of them already.

But love will blind all failure.